I was going through my notes yesterday and came across these raw words of mine typed out a few weeks ago. Fun fact: When my mind gets loud + my heart heavy I write notes to God. No formalities. I just let the pen glide or the fingers type across the keyboard and lay it all bare. So here I am inviting you into my notes with the hope + expectation that you’re spurred on. I have this feeling you too want what I want, have been where I was and desire to be moving forward + closer to Jesus with every breath you take.
What I want:
I want to know you more, Lord. Not the intellectual kinda know but the deep-down-in-my-soul-I-feel-restless-for-You kind of knowing. I want to be fully satisfied in You alone. I want to enjoy YOU MORE and hate sin more. I want to wake up first thing in the morning and my thoughts be Yours and when my head hits the pillow in the evening…those moments are reserved for You too. I want to walk away from my time with You changed a bit more each day. I want to invite You into all the moments of my day and not have You boxed into a “chair time.”
I want it to be easy to see that I have been with You. For the good of others and all the Glory is Yours.
Where I have been:
And yet despite all this holy wanting there’s a constant pulling under. A move against the current of this world that can leave one feeling alone and tired. Before I know it I have been caught up in it. Distracted. Forgetful. Self-serving. Heart + mind cluttered with worldly things. My true citizenship forgotten. But God. You beckon me from this.
I cry out in response to the Garden of Eden question that you still ask “where are you?” The light breaks through and suddenly I am awake. Pulling away from the world and running towards You.
How I move forward:
I draw near to you alone Lord. My heart is wide open ready to be searched fully. Confessing that which does not belong there. Repenting over the sin and imagining the heartbreak and feeling the weight of it all. Your grace abounds and I delight in your Presence and pursuit of me. I meditate on your WORD inviting your promised Spirit to do the holy work with my all in heart. I am still and quiet. Ready to receive + move as a Child of God + Citizen of Heaven. While the work in my heart here doesn't end on this side of eternity your promises compel me to keep coming back to Jesus. And so I will. With praise on my lips + holy expectation in my heart. I am Yours.
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My hope is you feel a little less alone + a whole lot spurred on for MORE time with Jesus. Because it is our absolute delight. AMEN?!
Let’s end with this prayer by A.W. Tozer:
O God, quicken to life every power within me, that I may lay hold on eternal things. Open my eyes that I may see; give me acute spiritual perception; enable me to taste Thee and know that Thou art good. Make heaven more real to me than any earthly thing has ever been.
Amen.
EnJOY a day + everyday thereafter close to Jesus!
89 comments
Aug 29, 2025 • Posted by Nobody
Have just took the time and acknowledged that you don’t love anyone are anything,Whats the fake smile somebody else pain and misery,that all we can say for the last 16 years ,what’s life not into the stranger that don’t like you anyways,is that what I want to say everyday no love ,all I can think about is that I really don’t love the person that I’m with what we been doing for 20 years, we don’t love
Aug 29, 2025 • Posted by Nobody
Well God it’s nobody again in need of prayer,why is the world so cold and sick,it’s like a plaque spreading and nobody’s cares but when it comes to foolishness they all about it ,who wants to hear it who wants to see it,maybe the next one fine having a good time and that’s not me,why not self and nobody else I don’t have a friend in the world these dudes stink,they go threw heromone problems,hot flashesh and other nonsense
Aug 28, 2025 • Posted by Nobody
The very untrue unfortunate man not into anybody at all once on young and old ,old just in the yard doing yard work,old just sitting in the truck in store parking lot,old whaten into them young because I was married to the same one 30 years,old not into people
Aug 28, 2025 • Posted by Nobody
Black not just because I want to be black in the situations,two people the same age 18 never worked before what they looking for,maybe into two different worlds not friends at all wouldn’t even talk to each other on the phone,the other two too old,and really know they not friends and success is slim to none when they startedto late just trying to survive,not friends at all don’t call on the phone
Aug 28, 2025 • Posted by Nobody
Well God it’s me again nobody they can forget me since they not breaking there car running packing them off just to much talking for me since the next one ain’t sitting around looking stupid
Aug 28, 2025 • Posted by Nobody
Well God it’s nobody again,I’m wondering when the next person can move like a ghost never heardareseen,to many different people in one bucket and I’m not even trying to get out,y’all good not into one me never heard are seen tell it to the devil he’s the only one that heard it when it all went wrong.and he only work in humans animals nature instinct humans they think and choose
Aug 28, 2025 • Posted by Nobody
Well God it’s nobody again I hope forever somebody stop thinking I’m in these people eye sight because they want stop talking ,and doing wrong,as they forever will be sitting in there own home without rest of the world heard yourself lately
Aug 28, 2025 • Posted by Nobody
Well God it’s nobody again I hope forever somebody stop thinking I’m in these people eye sight because they want stop talking ,and doing wrong,as they forever will be sitting in there own home without rest of the world heard yourself lately
Aug 26, 2025 • Posted by Nobody
Well God it’s nobody again I’m broke as helland without love nothing’s profitable,without love it’s useless,no way home on borrowed time,and love is the greatest of all things,no love it’s useless it’s like chasing the wind folly like talking all day it’s just useless and folly no matter how many times you say it it’s a waste of time wheres the good times the love the happiness where’s the enjoyment love the greatest of all things Faith hope and love
Aug 24, 2025 • Posted by Nobody
Well God it’s nobody again,and jokes on when person really didn’t plan for you to be successful,work how ,work where,all I hear is trouble and I wouldnt want to be you ,in other languages it’s called jail,hell, unemployment no chance for mail,and we sound stial,for common folks not your everyday average hobo ,means football Sunday fishing and home homeboy now where you catching that bus to
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